Anxiety...it sucks, there is no other way around it. To go to sleep and wake up every day with the feeling that something just isn't right. I am always scared that maybe something really isn't right. I never had any issues with anxiety (besides social anxiety) until last year when my heart just started pounding out of my chest for no reason. Today, i feel like I have come a long way....I no longer am at the doctor every week...mainly because I have lost faith in them...but I still struggle tremendously. I am not sure how to overcome it. I do not want to go on the medication for fear of it getting worse or having horrible side effects. I do not want to change me as a person, I really like me as a person but I am so tired of this anxiety having a hold over me. I went to a psychologist to hear what I already know...he did get my doctor to prescribe one medication that I did take and I had a horrible reaction. He diagnosed me with OCD which I already knew (I wish I had the cleaning/neat freak OCD...lol).
So what do I do? Do I sit and push through each day the best I can? Is there another alternative? I make myself do things even if I dont want to...even minor things like driving up to the bank and cashing a check. I dont know where all this anxiety suddenly came from. I dont know why I am constantly feeling faint and out of it. I'm fearful that things will not get better and I'll be stuck like this forever. Its not fair to myself, my kids, or my family. I just want to go back to living a normal life....being the girl that could drive cross country alone and have no problems with it. Where did that girl go?!? I need to find her. I do not want to fall apart and I do not want to let this beat me.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment